Giving Up

Today is, for many people, the start to a 40-day season of sacrifice. That's right, I'm talking about Lent. I was raised Catholic, and while I don't identify with any particular religion at this point in my life, I still tend to either give something up or add something positive to my life during Lent. I see it as an exercise in self-discipline, among other things.

This time, I'm giving up soda--hopefully for good, not just for 40 days. I'll admit that I'm super lazy, and if I can quickly grab a can of soda rather than pour myself a glass of water (or take the time to mix a flavor powder into a bottle of water), I'll do it. It used to be just diet soda, but I've recently begun drinking non-diet things, as well, when a diet version of the flavor I want isn't available.

I do this knowing how horribly unhealthy soda is, how it's full of all kinds of crap, and how it makes me crave other sweet things.

That stops now. Six weeks without soda will be very beneficial. I'll drink more water, which will keep me hydrated and energized. I'll consume less chemicals and such via the soda itself. And it'll hopefully cut back on my sugar cravings.

I'm also going to add a habit into my life during this season. Each day in my email I receive Mahin's "Daily Bellydance Quickies," in which Mahin spotlights a difference bellydance-related topic each day. Some days focus on musicality and videos of performances, while other days focus on technique and practice. In an effort to improve my own skills (and to be able to tell my teacher that yes, I am practicing!), I will practice each technique-related tidbit I get in my daily email. In addition, on the days that spotlight music or videos, I will go back in my email archives and find another technique to practice.

I'm terrible with transitions in writing, so onward we go. I've been getting a lot of exercise in lately, due to the fact that I made a friend a few weeks ago who has lost 90-ish pounds already and is now the same weight as I am. We talk food, weight loss, exercise, she comes to belly dance class now, and we've gone to several other classes together (zumba and piloxing). It's great to have a buddy in this. It makes things more fun, and I'm held more accountable. For example, we went to Eat n Park for dinner last night, and while I usually choose something not so unhealthy from the menu there, I was especially conscious of my choices because my friend was there, and I didn't want to look bad haha

I was supposed to go rock wall climbing with some people this afternoon, and while I was uncertain last night when I agreed to go, I really psyched myself up for it today. And then my car didn't start. Since I had the day off work and my parents had to go in separate directions this morning, I was left with my old car, which is basically a "just in case" car. I tried for 20 minutes to get that thing started, and it just didn't happen. I had to cancel on my friends because even though my mom was on her way home, I wouldn't have been able to meet them in time.

Honestly, I was more upset about it than I really should have been. I cried (though I tried not to let my mom hear on the phone), just because I was so frustrated. I actually had plans, I have friends to go out with, I was looking forward to it, and then my plans were ruined. But really, did I need to cry over it like a baby? Yeah, girl week is coming up in a few days, and that makes me a bit more emotional, but never this bad. The only explanation I have is that I've been so highly strung and stressed out recently, I just needed to cry.

Oh, and my mom was able to start the car on the first try when she got home. Go figure.

Good Times

Wow, has it really been almost a month since my last post? Ha. That didn't take long. I'll try to do better.

There have been a lot of stressful things going on lately--mostly dealing with work. I don't remember if I mentioned it last month, but I'm temporarily the cafe manager at work, which is kind of a "stretch assignment" for me, to see how I'll fare as the "real" cafe manager in the future. Go, me. Apparently I'm doing pretty well, according to everyone who tells me to my face that I am. All I'm really able to focus on, though, are how many things are going wrong--things I've screwed up myself (weekly order, mostly, as we continue to run out of things even when I thought I got everything) as well as things that are beyond my control (employees leaving, hour cuts). I almost feel like everything is being orchestrated, just to see how I react, because I'm SURE the real cafe manager doesn't have to deal with all of this all the time. Right? (Paranoid--that's me!)

At any rate, the stretch assignment should be coming to an end soon, and I'll be thankful. As much as I'm enjoying my pay raise, and as sad as I'll be to lose it, I'm utterly exhausted by the stress of the past month. And I'll be happy as can be when the usual cafe manager comes back, because then I'll get to spend more time with her (she's one of my best friends).

That said, I'm thinking about going back to school. To study nutrition. I know, right? The fat girl who has a horrible relationship with food wants to possibly become a nutritionist. But I figure learning as much as I can will help me in the long run, and it would be nice to make a career out of something I care about. I could easily combine a nutrition/dietetics degree with my social work degree.

As for the Rock Star Challenge, we are five weeks in--which is the halfway point. I missed the last two weekly challenges, and I missed one week of classes, but other than that, I've been doing at least 2 classes a week at that studio, plus bellydance. Tonight I did a core sculpt class and piloxing, before our weekly challenge, so I got in a hell of a workout, and I'll be ever-so-sore for the rest of the week. Totally worth it, though, because as I discovered when I decided (against my initial thoughts) to get my midway measurements taken tonight, I've lost 4.5 pounds and about 3 inches. That was so unexpected because I really haven't been eating well at all. So it was all exercise; now I'm imagining how the losses will pick up as I start to eat better. I might even have a chance at winning the challenge as a whole! (By the by, I did win tonight's weekly challenge, a game of musical yoga mats where we did various exercises to get to the mats, and then various exercises ON the mats. It was fun, although I discovered that I suck at the crabwalk. Thankfully, so does everyone else.)

So that's my update. I've had a long day, as Mondays tend to be for this little manager. 7am meetings are not my friend, but at least my day is halfway over by 11am. I work tomorrow as well, and I have Wednesday off. I think I'll spend that day making pretty things and scheduling doctor appointments (and a massage). Good times.

Rock Star

Guess what I did tonight?

After months of being fairly inactive, aside from dance classes, occasional walks, and being on my feet all day at work, I took a 30 minute core class. And a 60-minute Piloxing (Pilates + kickboxing) class.

I also joined the Rock Star Challenge at You Rock Fitness, a fitness center run by a friend of mine. We were divided into two teams of 9(ish), and I love my teammates already. They were so fun! We all set our goals and, over the next 10 weeks, we hope to lose 98 pounds between the 9 of us.

My personal goal was not related to pounds or the number on the scale. I'm currently between a size 16 and a size 18. My goal is to be a size 12/14 by the end of March. Totally doable.

We also had our first challenge tonight. We'll have one each week. This week, we had a deck of playing cards, all mixed up, and a corresponding list with each card in a random order. We had to trot through a rope ladder on the floor, run across the dance floor, do 10 jumping jacks, look through the deck and find our card, run back, do 10 more jumping jacks, and trot through the ladder again. We had to do this enough times to get through the entire deck of cards, and they had to be in the order they were listed on the paper we were given. My team won! Granted, there was some (okay, a lot) of cheating by both teams, which obviously doesn't benefit our physical health in any way, but it was super-fun for everyone, and it was good for team-building. :-)

Ch-ch-ch-changes

A few notes...

I've been doing pretty well with not eating the food at work. All I've had is a bagel yesterday and another today (both multi-grain), and while that's more than I wanted, I'll own it and accept it. A couple months ago, I would have told myself, "Oh, I'm getting a bagel, I might as well get (insert-dessert-here) and (insert-drink-here)...'just to put our sales up.'" I didn't get any add-ons with these bagels--not even cream cheese. Go, me.

On that note, I have tomorrow off and will be putting together a couple meals to take to work to avoid the need for bagels.

On another work-related note, I've gotten a "temporary promotion" and will be the cafe manager for the next 4-6 weeks or so. While this will pretty much eliminate my financial stress (yay!) it may increase my work-related stress (boo!). It hasn't been bad so far, except for my first attempt at making an employee schedule for next week, and I'm thinking that it won't be terribly nerve-wracking. At least, I'm trying to tell myself that. I'm trying to be laid-back and not worry about it. At the same time, I AM keeping in mind some healthy ways that I'll relieve any additional stress, so I don't revert to bad habits.

I have some new goals. Not really measureable ones, but goals nonetheless:

1. I have a weekend of bellydance workshops coming up in April. As my schedule stands, I'll be taking 4 classes over 2 days, so about 4 hours of dancing each day. However, I would like to add 1 or 2 more classes to that weekend, which will mean there's a possibility that I'll be doing up to 6 hours of dancing in one day. My stamina is, of course, nowhere NEAR that level. I need to fix that, and I have about 3.5 months to do it.

2. I'm going to Pennsic this summer (http://www.pennsicwar.org) and I want to look good if, by some stroke of craziness, I end up dancing around a fire or something.

Restart

I've got a renewed motivation, I'm revising my plan, I've revamped my blog, and now it's time for my upgrade.

Why a blog, again? Because it helps. When I was blogging, I weighed less (for various reasons, of course), and I was more mindful of what was going into my mouth, as well as how much activity I was doing.

I'm not one to make New Year's resolutions. January 1st is just another day, to me, and while I know others see a new year as a fresh start, I just think it's silly to wait until a particular day to start to change my life. If something is worth doing, it's worth starting now. (You'd never be able to tell, just by that statement, that I'm actually a horrible procrastinator.)

I wasn't sure if I should get a new blog all together or just redecorate this one and delete my old entries, etc. My decision came down to this: I didn't care to open another account or get another log-in name or URL to remember. So here you have it.

I'm at the end of my second day off of three in a row, and I'm quite thankful that I decided to take my paid holiday off, rather than just have the extra paid hours added onto the 5 days I would normally work this week.

Tonight will be spent writing out a plan of attack. Good stuff.